A View from Behind

      MY "BACKSTORY":      I motioned to a large cardboard box, bulging and obviously heavy. To me, that one box was precious.  

The Greyhound bus driver grunted at it, the same way he had just grunted at me…perhaps because both it, and I, were obviously barely able to hold it together.  

I was headed to a state I had never seen before, more than a thousand miles away. As the driver unceremoniously threw everything that I owned into the baggage compartment, I threw myself into a back seat, and pulled out my wallet.  

I had $76.00 left. That was plenty of money to start a new life. I had three days of travel ahead of me. That was plenty of time to plan for that new life. I had no doubt that on the other end of this bus ride, my friend would be there, to meet me. I don’t remember doubting the outcome, even once.  

Over the years, and miles that followed, the cardboard boxes grew, both in number, and in size. Greyhound buses were replaced by a variety of unreliable cars and trucks, and U-Haul trailers. I would always run out of money before I ran out of road. Along the way, I took temporary jobs at a cattle yard, a restaurant, a disco bar, a sandwich shop, a Q-tip factory (yes, those DO exist!), a pizza parlor, a drive-in, and a glitzy resort.  

Years of wandering left me wondering... What else could I fit into the cardboard box of my life?  

I enrolled in a trade college, graduated in less than a year, and discovered my unquenchable thirst for knowledge. The next day, I packed everything I owned into my Opal Kadet. I navigated the 2,000-miles back home to attend Western State Colorado University; singing along with the hits of the 80's.  I don’t remember doubting the outcome, even once.  

I financed my BA in Mass Media and Communications by working 3 jobs at once, and attending college year-round, full-time. My love affair with music and production began in earnest at one of my jobs, as a Traffic and Continuity Director at a radio station. When I won my first award for production, little did I know that I was shaking hands with my secret passion! Meanwhile, my other job as a journalist, columnist, and Advertising Director at a newspaper allowed me to win more awards for writing, and ad composition.  

After graduation, and a subsequent internship in Interactive Media Production, my boxes became suitcases, and my cars morphed into airplanes. Once again, I found myself counting on a friend to meet me at my destination (this time overseas). And once again, I don’t remember ever doubting the outcome.  

After a year in England working for a newspaper, I returned to my hometown long enough to retrieve my car, hug my mother, and hit the road again. Several jobs at newspapers, radio stations, and advertising agencies followed. However, music kept drawing me back. By day, I was writing scripts and jingles for clients. By night, I was secretly producing my own projects and songs in the backrooms of radio stations.  

I'm not sure when it happened, (probably because it happened overnight). I found myself hanging around with Eddie Rabbitt, the Judds, and meeting their new opening artist, Randy Travis. I remember chilling with Firefall, chatting with George Strait, joking with Lyle Lovett, and spending a weekend in the studio with Flash Cadillac.  

There was something nostalgic about the way music made me feel. Music called to me from a road more compelling and exotic than any road I had ever traveled before. I discovered that a song could be far more substantial for carrying my soul than cardboard. I began thinking outside of the box.  

Like countless others, I followed the songs... from small bars to big stars, from crude rages to huge stages. I finally ended-up, new and naïve, in Nashville.  

Nashville taught me how to live cheap, write fast, and hustle hard. I scraped by. I worked as many full, and part-time jobs as I could during the day, so I could write songs late into the night. My Nashville resume included; working as an extra in music videos, charting the hits for the Indie Bullet, writing press releases for artists and albums, selling and designing ads for concert souvenir books, writing for publishers, (and a short career selling electronics at Sears).  

I had met Willie Nelson several times by the time I discovered concert promotion. “On the Road Again” became my theme song, as I traveled through several states. I paused in each town only long enough to line up venues, radio interviews, and sponsors, for artists’ upcoming tours.  

One autumn, miles away from Nashville, I was offered a stable job in marketing, the love of a good man, and a chance at a simpler life. I took the exit lane. My recordings, my lyric sheets, my songs, and my soul went back into a cardboard box.  

For a while, there were diapers instead of deadlines. I did remodels, not re-mixes. I came up with variations of meal preparations, in place of various chord progressions. But people change, children grow, and cardboard can’t contain a soul.  

Today, I travel the world with the internet. I work with the most amazing producers and artists, several time zones away. All my roads lead to the same destination. I still know, there will always be a friend there to meet me. I occasionally remember that big, cardboard box. It reminds me... 

Never doubt the outcome, even once.